[Anonymous]

[BlackTower]

I feel moved to raise the specter of ordinary people populating First Class cabins.  You know who you are! Please stop reducing the experience for those of us who are wealthy and get back to business class where you belong! Take your rumpled off the peg suits and untidy lives and get out of our way! Your delight at being upgraded and tendency to drink too much distracts from cabin crew attending to the genuine needs of the international super rich and our many homes, cars, mistresses and businesses. The rules are suntan,smart watch, disinterest and cashmere. Do not eat or use the amenity kit and do not talk to fellow passengers unless you met them in Klosters/St Barts. If you can’t follow those simple rules then you will never fit in even if you get monied up. Begone with you! As for cabin crew seated in First you are welcome to an upgrade if you die in flight and have suitable cashmere. As a courtesy I am willing to extend that offer to passengers in other classes.

[DisgustedofSwieqi]

Black Tower

Understand that sitting in first is the privilege of airline employees.

You are the prole, as you think that your amount of money and privilege qualify you to sit there, they do not you sad little individual.

If you were really rich, you would have your own GV and 25m yacht.

[FlyingChinaman]

Black Tower: I take it as an April Fool’s farce. If not you must be quite a character and I’d like to meet you just to see if you are what you really appeared to be!

[NTarrant]

Can’t be an April fools joke, they have to be played before 1200 and BlackTower posted at 2051, so who is the fool?

What is your proffessional opinion Disgusted?

[DisgustedofSwieqi]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_the_Internet,_nobody_knows_you%27re_a_dog

[Inquisitive]

Dear Black Tower, I mostly travel in Business – however travel so many times, that Airlines provides Gold, Solitaire etc. cards and occasionally upgrade me to first class. I remain always clear about my upgraded status and look towards the people (Proles?) travelling in First with awe. Are these guys really travelling with own money or deserve to be here. I only observe, keep very quite. Allocated mostly seat at row 5, I also get out first. So at least you will have peace from me. Happy travel in first.

[lloydah]

I think BlackTower must be related to John Cleese. I’d like to meet both of them – loved the post.

[FlyingChinaman]

We can have an international party together and I can play the funny Chinese receptionist!!!

One of my fantasies!!!

[BlackTower]

Should have been funnier folks but i am pleased with the cashmere/death combo. If only Michael Winner had written it from the heart……..

[FlyingChinaman]

Yes, You must be joking or the Joker!!! 198……????

How of of dates and out of fashion!!!!

[stevescoots]

nice one, well I saw the funny side of it anyway 🙂

I am flying business to LAX soon, my son and son in law are in cattle on the same flight. As such the moment we go through security I will not acknowledge them , not look at them and ignore them comletly, if they come near me stateside and talk to me before baggage I will report them to TSA and have the cavity searched, the lower class peasents that they will be.

All men are born equal until check in!

[BlackTower]

“Quiet in the cheap seats” shouted though the curtains at the biz premium economy border should add to their experience without catching any diseases 😉

[RogerVictor]

I thought you turned right on a plane to get to the toilets?

[lloydah]

You mean there are toilets back there too?

[Author]

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