[Anonymous]

[LeTigre]

http://www.businesstraveller.com/middle-east/news/qatar-airways-unveils-b787-seats

Today Qatar Airways have launched their new business class and economy seats destined for service on 787 aircraft, which will be operating to LHR from July.

The latest iteration of Qatar’s popular business seat is 80 inches long and 30 inches wide, which is just long enough for Mr Al Baker to gain bragging rights to the longest seat while maintaining enough space to take up what could have otherwise been useful space as a fish reflexology tank.

Meanwhile its new economy seat ensures that passengers travelling in the back of the plane have a more romantic experience. “By designing seats that are less than 17″ wide in economy, while the average shoulder width is far wider, Qatar Airways can ensure that its passengers are literally all over each other” states Mr Al Baker. Qatar Airways’ new seats are also in a less dense configuration than seats on the A380, due to the A380 being significantly wider, as Mr Al Baker kindly points out.

The new 787s will feature the much talked about new light-bulbs and tinted windows which will ensure that crew members can take out their anger on passengers rather than striking by keeping the passengers up all night with strobe lighting and sudden un-tinting of the windows.

Another feature which the 787 will provide is a more humid atmosphere inside the plane, ensuring rapid microbial growth and sudden bursts of rain to suit English passengers better. “By stimulating bacteria and virus growth inside the plane, new diseases can be circulated during the flight, providing an immune system boost when passengers leave” explains Boeing VP for passenger discomfort, Dr F.R.Ankenstein.

One thing passengers can be sure of on the 787, though, is that they will arrive at their destination. Dr F.R.Ankenstein confirms this: “The 787 is absolutely the safest plane is the sky, or rather will be, when a new timescale has been issued. Passengers can be sure to arrive safely, at least…if they don’t fly Air France.”

[VintageKrug]

I’m surprised the dwarves don’t sue for defamation.

Personally, I’m rather looking forward to the 787. It should signal a sea-change in longhaul travel comfort.

The change between disembarking a new-ish A380 and the unpleasant “jet engine film” which demands a good shower on landing after disembarking a 747 (and to a lesser extent the older 777s) proves how improved these latest aircraft are in terms of cabin air quality.

[LeTigre]

Come on, I was only joking VK, get down off the high-horse, and try to snuggle up in the QR coach.

[RichHI1]

Tad childish Hengli….

[LPPSKrisflyer]

Well I thought it was funny.

[VintageKrug]

Well, he is only young, and it’s good to have some young blood here.

I thought it was quite amusing, actually *raises corner of mouth*

[LeTigre]

So did I *raises bottom corner of nose* .

Thank you LPPSKrisflyer, I really like sarcastic writing, and was inspired after making it to the BT magazine.

http://www.businesstraveller.com/archive/2011/november-2011/special-reports/living-the-dream

I am 18 at present.

[RichHI1]

Never one to discourage youth, keep practicising…

[stevescoots]

VK, suprised you missed the spelling mistake in BT article 😉

[StephenLondon]

I hear LHR will be the first long-er haul route for the QR787 following some intra-Gulf flights. J product looks nice.

[Bucksnet]

9 across on a 787 with seats less than 17 inches wide is too tight, and Qatar says other carriers (Emirates) have 10 across. They fail to mention that the 777 is wider than the 787, and the A380 even wider.

At the other extreme, 4 across in business with an 80 inch pitch is too much. What are they going to do in first?

[IanFromHKG]

Hengli, ignore them all, I thought the post was hilarious – a much-needed dose of real humour on this forum!

Do some more, please!

[LeTigre]

Your wish is my command.

[JonathanCohen09]

Good morning Hengli123,

Does your last post mean that you are a Genie and if so can you grant me 3 wishes.

Loved your post by the way, thought it was very funny!!

[Author]

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