[capetonianm]

“No problem” when you ask for a drink at a bar or place an order in a restaurant.

Well, it shouldn’t be a problem, should it? That’s what they’re there for. If I went to a veggie restaurant and ordered fillet steak I would expect it to be a problem, if I ordered a nut roast I wouldn’t expect it to be a problem.

[capetonianm]

Another one, incorrect use of ‘myself’, for example :
“On behalf of myself”
“You can speak to myself”

[FDOS_UK]

[quote quote=870399]if I ordered a nut roast I wouldn’t expect it to be a problem.[/quote]

Might be……

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_incidents_of_cannibalism#2010%E2%80%93present

You might want to prefix ‘nut’ with something 🙂

[Chris in Makati]

I can tolerate “Can I get” but I can’t stand people ordering things by saying “I’ll get” or “I’ll take”.

Talking of funny ways of saying things, the cabin crew member serving our meal on Norwegian last week started off by asking each passenger “Will you be joining us for lunch today?”

[IanFromHKG]

[quote quote=869679]I detest being called ‘sir’. Or ‘Mr xxx’. As soon as someone, say a crew member on a plane, says ‘how do I say your surname’ (it is a bit tricky) I always reply ‘please call me xxx (my first name)’[/quote]

Um – Fer-guh-sern??

I tease….

I will say that to me it all depends on context. I can understand that in this increasingly-politically-correct and increasingly-casual world, we can no longer expect the level of formality that my parents enjoyed (I remember my father – a senior partner (and later THE senior partner) at a well-known City law firm – once telling me about an associate who had indirectly received a suggestion from my Dad saying that he had “received a message from God”). Thankfully hierarchies nowadays are no longer quite so entrenched!

However, I do resent the general assumption that just because I am paying someone to provide a service to me, they are entitled to use my Christian name. There are a few occasions when I have had someone on the ‘phone asking “How may I address you?”. I like that. I always answer “Mr [IanFromHKG]” because that is my personal preference. I do not wish to invoke a level of familiarity that isn’t justified.

An example of this, operating in reverse, came when we employed our first domestic helper in Hong Kong. Unaccustomed to the idea of having domestic help, we asked our then helper to use our Christian names, and she responded by saying (very politely) that that was inappropriate, as we were her employers, and she would call us Sir and Madam. And she was correct – it helped to maintain a certain distance that prevented what was always going to be a personal relationship becoming TOO personal. Our current domestic helper has been with us for two decades, and has lived in our home all that time, and seen our children grow up. She loves them, they love her, but we are still Sir and Madam, and that works.

When it comes to more casual payer/payee relationships (such as restaurant personnel) then I am more relaxed. And I will confess to using “guys” in a casual context to a group including women. Perhaps I should rethink that.

However, I will say that I draw the line at “dude”!

[canucklad]

I agree with Ian from HKG, regarding the use of Sir/Madam.
Unless of course you’ve been knighted or manage a brothel !!

I get the cultural context , but for me it feels like an abdication of personalised service. I’ll take it further and suggest it distances the service provider from accountability. If I heard any of my people addressing a customer in such an impersonal manner I’d be asking why. Even if the customer had such an unpronounceable name as R. Fuer- Gee- San : )

My diktat is simple — If you know the customer’s name, it’s pretty rude not to address them by their name.

As I said I’m pretty relaxed about be referred to as “Son” or “lad” and maybe it’s a geographical (yanks/aussies) in HK but I never been addressed as “dude” back here in Blighty.

I must admit, I do cringe when I hear the younger (not much) generation refer to each other as “babe” or “man” . Especially this nonsense of finishing every sentence with the MAN. And when its emphasised it really does irritate !

[esselle]

Some countries create a plural of gentlemen, which becomes gentlemens, which I actually quite like.

[EU_Flyer]

‘Guys’ I can live with. Is ‘Mate’ the singular term for “Guys”?

I can’t stand Mate, by the way.

Completely agree with IanFromHKG and others that context is relevant. In Australia, I’ve been called ‘mate’ repeatedly when flying business class on Qantas and Virgin and it kind of works from certain blue eyed surfy types with beach blond hair and deep tans from far north Queensland.

Yet on BA or any European, ME or Asian airline I can’t imagine ever hearing that. In these regions a level of formality exists which simply doesn’t exist in Australia or even the United States. Asia is particularly formal and IanFromHKG’s example of the domestic helpers feeling uncomfortable with the use of first name is spot on.

Anyway fellas, time to hit the sack. Cya 😉

[Chris in Makati]

[quote quote=871126]An example of this, operating in reverse, came when we employed our first domestic helper in Hong Kong. Unaccustomed to the idea of having domestic help, we asked our then helper to use our Christian names, and she responded by saying (very politely) that that was inappropriate, as we were her employers, and she would call us Sir and Madam. And she was correct – it helped to maintain a certain distance that prevented what was always going to be a personal relationship becoming TOO personal. Our current domestic helper has been with us for two decades, and has lived in our home all that time, and seen our children grow up. She loves them, they love her, but we are still Sir and Madam, and that works.[/quote]

In the Philippines, staff will often use Sir together with your first name for regular customers that they know. I’m always called “Sir Chris”. It felt strange at first but I’ve got used to it and now I like the way it combines a degree of respect together with an element of familiarity too.

[Author]

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