Well I think this is a very amusing thread and I believe I’m not known on this board for my humour 😉
I love the idea of retro-first. Perhaps instead in honour of the person who will be its staunchest defender no matter how bad it is, it ought to be called Vintage First? There could be an in flight film projected on the screen at the front of the cabin about BAs greatest achievements, come to think of it they could just re-run that dreadful advert about pilots to save money and in line with their latest thinking on linens in the cabin the crew could wear tie-dyed t-shirts made of old hotel bed sheets.
I can’t wait.