Frankly, every time I have to sully my Guccis on the hard surface of a public area I am thoroughly Disgusted.
Air Malta always carries me to its luxurious multi-storey lounge complex in a barouche-landau, staffed by taxpayer-funded liveried flunkies with fresh Frangipani scent wafted by a slew of virgins in advance of my progress.
Anything else is simply a disgrace. A disgrace, I tell you!
*waddles off to film next series of “One Foot in the Grave”*