If unfamiliar cities cause your survival instincts to go into overdrive, it may take an evening to acclimatise to Stockholm's not-very-mean streets. Clean, green, wholesome and hip, the Swedish capital has a way of wrong-footing anyone expecting a conventionally menacing metropolis. Virtually no one chains up their bicycle, alcohol-fuelled brawling seems non-existent, and graffiti is a genre rather than an act of vandalism. Even the death-metal fans manifest sweetness and a sense of social responsibility. And the average Swede is so superb at English that you might as well limit your learning to hej (pronounced "hey") – Swedish for "hi".
The first time I visited Stockholm, I arrived a day short of Midsummer's Eve, though in Stureplan, one of the city's most swish shopping and schnapps-sipping zones, the celebrations were focused more on a combination of payday and a first-round European Cup draw with Italy. We didn't arrive at our hotel until 9.30pm, but the festive atmosphere and June's all-night twilight promised hours of fun ahead. We found an outdoor table at a Sturehof brasserie, wrapped our knees in the blankets draped over every chair, and alternated happily between eating five kinds of herring and beautiful-people watching.
Even summer nights tend to be chilly and the sea air is bracing even at its balmiest, so a Stockholm winter is as icy as you can imagine, with ski gear and furs everywhere. But its bars and restaurants are warm and welcoming, glögg (mulled wine) cocks a snook at the biting cold, and the snowy scenery, especially late at night or first thing in the morning, is unfailingly magical. Whichever time of year you go, you'll find a city with an enviable climate of prosperity and confidence: Sweden's intelligent culture, democratic government and genuine Third Way – a typically pragmatic balance between corporate capitalism and a modern welfare state – are the pride of its people.
A settlement built over 14 islands, inner Stockholm covers some 216sqkm, of which a third is water. Suburban sprawl is minimal: if you were to drive out of town to the north or west, you'd soon be in moose country. Sail east into the Baltic Sea, among the 24,000 isles and islets that make up the Stockholm archipelago, and you'll find enough wilderness and raw beauty to keep the heartiest outdoor-types happy for a year.
If the sea air is tempting, a day trip to the picture-postcard Vaxholm or yachtie favourite Sandhamn is recommended. The bright summer light and broad blue sky create an invigorating sense of space – and may encourage you to plan further exploration of the archipelago's 50-mile reach into the Baltic.
The fresh air doesn't stop at the boat-thronged harbour. A wander around the shops will take you over bridges, along waterways, past lakes and through parks. Swimming in the city centre is a real option in summer, and following locals is the best guide. The central districts are easily navigable by foot and taxi, and each has its own feel, although the low-rise pastel-painted houses that make Stockholm such an attractive capital aren't confined just to the Old Town. Also known as Gamla Stan, this mazy, much-touristed little island is quaintly photogenic – especially the cobbled town square, Stortorget – if you can forgive the tat shops and absence of anything resembling real life. For Nordic-style old-world charm, Skansen is a vast open-air museum on the island of Djurgarden, where families, and anyone with a schnapps hangover, can wander healthily around the zoo and reconstructions of old-style buildings.
Gamla Stan links the heart of Stockholm – downtown Norrmalm, the wide residential avenues of Vasastaden, and glamorous, affluent Ostermalm – with hip Södermalm, and Langholmen's green haven. If you've only got a day to play with, you'd better decide whether the pull of the Baltic or that of the city's considerable retail pleasures is stronger. Norrmalm's office blocks and administrative buildings are interspersed with museums and shopping centres: the exclusive NK stands opposite the main tourist office on Hamngatan. The Kulturhuset, a seven-storey glass-walled cultural centre replete with comic-book library, theatre, galleries and cafes, presides over the faintly grubby pedestrian hub of Sergels Torg precinct.
To the east, upmarket Ostermalm, where we watched leggy blondes stepping out in Stureplan, offers the city's most extravagant shopping and clubbing. It could be characterised by Spy Bar, all VIP rooms and lipsticked tabloid-fodder, and glossy brasserie Riche, also on the main drag of Birger Jarlsgatan, a sometime haunt of Sven-Göran Eriksson. If this all sounds a bit too much, there are countless other bars and restaurants around, with hipper or homelier appeal. Away from the footballers' wives, most of Stockholm's ultra-cool venues are friendly and inclusive. The Lydmar, a boutique hotel whose rooms are each the work of a different homegrown design star, houses a furiously stylish yet very fun bar/performance space that attracts world-class live acts and DJs.
A slightly scruffier scene exists over on Södermalm, a night-time stew of all things indie and esoteric. Jazz, salsa and reggae fans can indulge at historic Mosebacke Etablissement (3 Mosebacketorg), while next door is Södra Teatern, a good bet for Swedish indie pop, folk, spoken-word acts and world music. Western classical music is well funded and well attended: on Hornsgatan, Folkoperan has been providing Stockholm's old opera house with healthy competition since the 1970s. Before your musical fix you can hang out with boho Södermalmers in the opera house bar/restaurant.
A studenty area on one hand – my favourite hang-out among the vintage shops on Bondegatan is String, an airy cafe where beatniks and stoners philosophise and flirt – Södermalm is also a peerless shopping quarter. Gotgatan is the perfect one-stop street if you're short of time, or could be the first chapter of a credit-card-caning odyssey if you're not. There's Filippa K for chic womenswear; cult cosmetics at Face Stockholm; classic Swedish design at 10-Gruppen; Ordning & Reda for stationery junkies; and the wonderful c/o Stockholm, a "lifestyle boutique" stocking Myla knickers, Missoni towels and Diptyque candles.
You don't have to be a specialist to appreciate the all-pervading design aesthetic; you may merely observe that everything looks great; that the city and society seem to function sensibly and pleasingly; that there is a super-abundance of good looks in the genes here. But the modernist, minimalist sensibility (growing warmer and more experimental in the 21st century) that we know and love may be a reflection of deeper national traits. Alex Bagner, design news and arts editor of Wallpaper magazine, whose launch issue featured Stockholm prominently as a pin-up for Nineties cool, says: 'Whether it's in design, architecture, fashion or catering, Swedes seem to achieve the ideal balance. They've even got the perfect word for it, lagom, which translates as 'just right'.
Noting how sensible a country is verges on damning it with faint praise, but there's more to the Swedes than their just-rightness and a willingness to queue. The national sense of humour is as dry as tinder on one hand, but demonstrative on the other; a good shaggy dog story or punning joke won't get Stockholmer men nodding or smiling, but roaring appreciatively and slapping their knees. And, just when you think you're in safe hands, that it's all perhaps a little sanitised, all this social awareness and faintly earnest fun, you stumble on a pocket of chaos. There's a late-night eatery, drinking hole and mini-casino on Norrmalm's Vasagatan, where tourists and students mingle with flaneurs and bar-flies until 5am. On a freezing winter night, when a night-cap turns into a party, and a Viking vein of black humour runs through the conversation, you'll end up bonding with all sorts of Nordic eccentrics. And if you stay up late enough, by the time you leave, there'll be nine inches of fresh snow to play in on the way back to your hotel.
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